Well dreaded July is almost over. Why dreaded July? Because its always my quietest month every season for past 5 seasons but in saying that this July up till now is my best July by a country mile but the nights are so unpredictable. One night quiet before dinner then manic after, the next night manic before dinner then manic after or its manic before dinner then quiet after. May. June. Sept and Oct are always the busiest months for Oceanic and each night is pretty much the same but July and August i hate but I'm not complaining as I'm still very busy and if the trend continues this will be my best season in 6 years.
As you know my security guard "John" went to that big beach volley ball court in the sky along with "Wilson" at the beginning of this season so i had to recruit a replacement. It just so happened that Alexander Meerkat tracked me down after he escaped from my oven back in South Wales but after partying hard in Laganas for a few weeks he has now blown his fortune from the adverts and needed some cash on the hip. So me being the kind generous person i am have employed him as my new night time security guard.
Alexander guarding the sacred Chambord.
Aww my dear friend and winter security guard John.
Since Helen left I've only been to the pool once, I've become a recluse from the sun as its so hot it just drains you and i need my energy for the bar but when i do get to go to the pool i like to use the pool at the Ilaria Hotel. "Wheres that?" i hear you cry, well its on the main road between Kalamaki and Laganas and if I'm being honest i think it knocks spots off some of the hotels in the top 10 on tripadvisor for Zakynthos but there isn't any tour company using it, they just get their bookings through private agencies which is such a shame as it's empty and its a wonderful hotel. So here is my good deed of the week, if your thinking of booking private and always hire a car while here why not give the Ilaria Hotel a go, i think its one of the best pools if not the largest I've seen on the island also the hotel and the grounds its in are lovely and such a waste of a beautiful place. The room prices on the website seem a bit high but I'm sure you could get that price down no problem.
The reception area, the lady in the pic was a cleaner not a tourist.
Reception from another angle.
The lounge area with bar.
View out from behind the bar.
Sun terrace outside bar looking out over pool.
One of the largest pools I've seen on the island but as you can see hotels empty and its July, there were only 3 other people there with myself at midday.
Next to the pool is a stage for acts and entertainment, this pic is taken from the seating area.
The amphitheatre seating area for when there used to be entertainment on.
The outdoor dining area.
The dining room which is spotless but no one here to use it.
The rooms are in separate buildings away from main hotel building.
Here is their website for you to have a browse around.
As you know i like my food, i can eat a KFC bargain bucket to myself, then there's my Big Boys Feast which is a burger, gyros pita, cheesy fries, garlic fries and a chefs salad, my Green Boat fish platter for 2 which i eat alone but one night i wasn't so hungry so just bought a ready made factory baguette from the supermarket. It looked juicy, it looked scrummy, it looked well filled, mmmmmmm!
What the god damn? Who has stolen my chicken? Jesus, what kind of nasty, mean, callous, heartless person would taunt me with such mental torture. Was the chicken they used anorexic? This kind of baguette cruelty i thought you only found on British Rail. People, forget the pre-made baguettes from the supermarket and get yourself off to the bakery opposite Mermaids on the main road, cost a bit more but at least its got a filling unlike this baron land cheap skate snack.
At the moment i am being controlled, my life is being led for me, i can't escape its strong hold it has over me, i want to break free but just can't, BLOODY AIR CONDITIONING! I go to sleep and its on. I wake up and its on. I turn it off but i can here it calling to me like a Harpy "Turn me on" (ooh eer misses) "you don't want to go out in the sun, you want to stay here with me" AAAGGGGH! Be gone you evil temptress i need thy sun on my pale skin. Curse thy battery in thus air conditioning remote when will they runeth dry? My life force is weakened by your cooling air, please release me so i may go and do my bidding (not as in ebay), please, please, PLEASE!
Lawrence Olivier award coming up for that performance i think LOL.
I'm going on holiday, yes people after the disaster that was Lanzarote 2 years ago, I've booked myself and Helen out to Cyprus after the season (also going to Leeds for a weekend LOL). I think we both deserve a break, Helen's had a really tough year and if this season stays as busy at it has been already my body will need a break, so we're going in style and booked us a posh hotel and upgraded our room to the best they had ooooOOOOH!
I was disgusted to see in Zakynthos town 2 women about 25 walking down Alexander Roma main shopping street just in Bikinis and let me tell you they were no super models and guess what nationality they were? Yep, British. How disrespectful can some people be. On this subject Kalamaki to me is starting to lose its charm. Over the past couple of weeks more 18-30's have come in to the resort. I've seen so many groups of girls and boys heading out to Laganas walking the streets with bottles of WKD or cans of lager. Only just last night around 2am a group of 6 young lads decided to run along the streets naked. Is this what the tour companies are turning Kalamaki in to? an extension of Laganas. I've spoke to a few of them and they all said they had booked Laganas weeks before but at last minute told it was double booked and Laganas was full so they were given Kalamaki. This is in fact rubbish. Talking with friends in Laganas it is the worst season to date with loads of empty rooms but its a game of cat and mouse for the tour companies. They keep holiday makers away from Laganas and tell hoteliers no one is booking Laganas so the hoteliers have to lower prices of rooms. The hoteliers know the tour companies want the rooms in Laganas so won't drop their prices, stalemate! When i opened Oceanic in 2007 i never saw 1 large group of girls or boys until 2010 since then I've seen more and more. Also a certain large tour operator is now doing a bar crawl in Kalamaki. Why are they spoiling this resort? Keep that sort of thing in Laganas. I know some tourists will say "well we never saw any of this while we were there" but some tourist don't go any further than a couple of hundred metres from their hotel and in bed by 11pm so of course they won't see it. I've seen the resort day in day out for 6 years now and trust me Kalamaki may be on its way to self extinction if the tour operators continue to treat the resort the way they are, lets hope not. Very sad.
Hello to the 8 new blog readers from Hungary and 5 new readers in Bulgaria.
Well that's it for another week, tremors over, suns out and time to get stuff sorted for bar, so until next week, "We're going to Cyprus, NAH, NAH NAH-NAH, NAH" LOL