"Oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a beautiful day, i don't remember the reeeeSSSSST, so we will just leave that way"
Yes its another day on the island in facts its my 1880th day or 45120 hours then again it could be 2,707,200 minutes. That was rather an Alan Partridge moment to figure out like that, A-HA!
How are you all today my lovely blog followers? I would like to welcome the new blog followers from Armenia and Georgia, Barev & Gamarjoba, that's hello in their languages not their names.
May is going very well indeed. Every single customer that has stepped in to Oceanic has returned and i mean every single one, so i can't really ask for any more and as always they have all been great friendly customers.
Now i like my food but would i really want to eat my buddy? Well that was on offer at Donkey Beach in Tsilivi could actually eat my buddy. I was shocked, appalled even but then it all became clear, they meant a sandwich or as we know it "A Butty"
Extreme eating experience
Ahhhhhhh, that's what they meant.
And smoothly moving on to eating experiences, i forgot to show you what i had when i went for a Gentleman's afternoon tea at the Park Plaza in Cardiff. It was so so good, as you know i love my buffet food, so this was posh buffet food.
Now then. As i wandered around my huge balcony i spotted something just laying still across my double patio doors. "That's funny" i thought "I can't remember buying a draft excluder".
Aggggghhhhhh, SNAKE! Yes there it was just laying in the shade after what it looked had just had its lunch. In length stretched out straight it was easily 4ft.
What do i do? It wasn't moving. I just bent down and stared at its head......Its tongue came out, IT'S ALIVE, IT'S GOD DAMN ALIVE, BUGGER!
OK, keep calm kev, what would Bear Grylls do in this situation, creep up on it, pounce, grab the head from behind just below the jaw, bite its head off, drink the blood, strip it of its skin and eat flesh for my dinner. NO, that's a bit to extreme and i'm not that desperate for food just yet as i still have 2 boxes of frosted shreddies in the cupboard.
A cloth over head so it keeps still while i grab it.
I get the cloth, slowly get close to it and drop the cloth.........Bugger, it moves back. I Pick the cloth up and try again..........it lifts up and moves, STAY STILL!
Then i remember i have a pole with a hook on it. I've seen them use these and the snake curls around it..........do they hell. I tried time and time again, do you think it even looked like it was going to curl up around it, not a chance. In the end it was a few quick flicks with the pole and over in to the garden it went. I AM MAN!
He not so tough.
Here you can see circled in red its dinner and the pole i had to grab to clear him away. Well would you be happy being poked after just having a big meal?
Now i don't watch much TV in the UK and especially over here as its all in Greek but i was amazed at 2 things i saw when i switched the TV on.
Firstly they have a program called "Your face sounds familiar" basically its stars in your eyes but i was shocked when they were interviewing a caucasian Greek male about who he was going to be only for him to step out blacked up. Now i'm not up on political correctness but is that still allowed?
And then a few days later at 2pm in the afternoon i found this film. I had to take a picture of the TV screen as you would never have believed me. When i watched part of it it was rather saucy, it was an early 1970's Greek version of Carry On.
One of my favourite beaches on the island is Donkey Beach but now they seem to be advertising it as something like an animal version of "Family Guy". Here i give you Donkey Quagmire. Its spooky.
And here is Quagmire
As always every season i try to add new designs to the t-shirt you can buy from the bar. Chris Cornell was a sad addition to the collection.
Remember a few updates ago when i was having a "Rant Time" about Fabletic gym wear and women not actually wearing it for the gym. It seems even women themselves have noticed this.
And like in the news the final funny.
I was reading the free Metro paper you get at train stations and came across this unfortunate headline. Now the story is actually horrific and terrible but i think they got the staple placement a little wrong.
A slight gap needed i think.
I know its not a long informative update this time but i have lots to do today but needed to fit an update in as trying to keep it to one update every fortnight as i know you just looooooove to keep up with whats going on the rock. So i promise a longer one next time but its getting a bit cloudy and i got washing on the line, a bar owners work is never done.
So until the next one,
Serve All, Love All, Peace All, Kevlar Out!